Mother and Son
by CacoPhoniA
Summary: Shizuo's mother reflects back on her life with her sons.


**A/N: This is my first Durarara! fic, and I had it in my head all day. I know I should be working on other projects, but I swear I'll get to those next. I just had to get this out of my mind.**

**0o0**

It had been excruciatingly painful, but she didn't care.

Here he was, the fruit of their love, her first baby, and now her world.

Shizuo.

She looked at his tiny little fingers, toes, and had counted each and every one, kissed every one of the little digits.

He was perfect. Perfect in every way possible. And he was hers. All 8 pounds and 13 ounces of him.

January 28th, she noted, and smiled as the little infant gave a small hiccup and cry. Perfect, amazing little Shizuo.

**0o0**

Shizuo grew quickly, losing the blue of every newborn's eyes that morphed ino an amber color that could only belong to his father. He crawled all over everything, was curious, and got into everything.

But the best was that he was learning to talk.

"_Dada."_

_"Mommy."_

_"Ducky."_

Every word he uttered was precious, but her favorite was:

_"Love you, Mommy."_

She wasn't aware that anyone's heart could swell so much with just one sentence. She couldn't process that love that she was feeling for her little son, her baby.

**0o0**

But one day, Shizuo wasn't her only baby.

Kasuka was born two years after Shizuo, and she loved him just as much.

Shizuo did as much as she did, she could tell, just from the way her first son stared at little Kasuka when he was brought home.

_"This is Kasuka, Shizuo, your baby brother."_

_"Kasuka?"_

_"Yes, see? He's looking at you."_

Indeed Kasuka was looking at his older brother, and Shizuo, with an amusingly serious expression on his face, gingerly reached out and took a tiny finger.

_"You're his older brother, and older brothers protect little brothers. Will you do that?"_

Shizuo hadn't looked up yet, gazing at his tiny little brother.

_"Prot-et?" _

_"Protect, yea. Will you do that?"_

Serious, he had looked up at his mother, still holding Kasuka's finger.

"_Uh-huh. He's mine, I'll love him and prot-et him."_

Then, in an incredibly sweet gesture, leaned down and kissed the newborn on the cheek.

The years went by fast, then, with her two little babies growing up so quickly.

She liked to observe them, the behavior they had towards each other. They carried a sense with each other that was similar to a "twin sense", except it was more. Shizuo would be drawing a picture, Kasuka would hand him the exact color that Shizuo needed, without asking. They would go and get ice cream, and Shizuo knew what flavor Kasuka wanted, and vice versa.

Shizuo lived up to his word, and forever protected Kasuka, all throughout elementary school. Kasuka was very quiet, and didn't talk too much, so Shizuo would always defend him, and come home, telling their mother all about the things that happened.

Then, Shizuo went into the hospital.

She had been at work when he recieved the phone call from Kasuka.

_"Mommy, Onii-san's hurt. Can you come home?"_

She had drove home at least 30 miles over the speed limit, nearly hitting a few cars along the way, and entered her home to find Shizuo on the kitched floor, writhing in pain, unable to move.

They had rushed to the hospital.

Later, after getting Shizuo's casts and everything that was needed to be done, she pulled aside Kasuka to ask what happened.

Shizuo hadn't wanted to talk about it, according to Kasuka.

_"He just picked up the fridge."_

_"What? Don't be silly honey, what really happened?"_

_"I'm not lying Mommy. He just picked it up and tried to throw it."_

But, like a rational person, she hadn't believed Kasuka. She simply took her two boys home and tried to interrogate Shizuo about it.

Instead of answering, his face just got red, and he went into his room, shutting the door with his good hand.

She proceeded to cook dinner, extremely confused as Kasuka drew a picture of a sunflower, sitting at the kitchen table.

**0o0**

Many hospital visits came after that, and curiously, all the incidents happened when she wasn't home.

And when once again, Shizuo refused to talk about how he had recieved his injuries, she was left with Kasuka to tell her what had happened.

_"This time he ripped a street sign from the ground."_

The lying had really gotten out of control when it came to Shizuo's injuries, but no other evidence was present, so she simply sighed and they went home.

The boys got out of the car and were heading inside the house when she noticed the crooked Yeild sign on the corner of the street.

It was messily stuck into the place it had originally sat, and if she squinted, she could see the imprint of a little hand, belonging to a child about Shizuo's size, on the edge of the sign.

She stared at it for a long time.

**0o0**

The strength in Shizuo, no matter how common it was shown afterwards, never became "the norm" for the family.

It was incredible, horrible.

Amazing, monstrous.

Incredible, knowing her son would always have some sort of defense.

Horrible as in the injuries it caused for other people and himself.

It when on for years, the constan hospital visits and damage to property. She never blamed Shizuo though. How could she? All she knew was that her son had something in him that made him incredibly strong when he became angry.

Middle school years for him came, while his brother, two years behind him, stayed in elementary.

With this, behavioral changes also came.

For one, he became much, much more serious than before. He didn't laugh much, or smile, and that bothered her. The only expressions that passed over his face were ones that included a furrowed brow, and a frown.

Kasuka stopped expressing himself, too as Shizuo grew worse. He hadn't ever been a very emotional boy, but eventually every reaction in him seemed to leak out.

Her boys were experiencing things she had hoped never would come upon them: Loneliness, Blankness.

**0o0**

One day, she came home late from work, when the boys were both home before her.

She had removed her shoes, and walked into the living room.

The t.v. was on, cartoons playing, and a few papers lay on the coffee table.

But, the only thing she was looking at was her sons.

Kasuka was holding Shizuo, who's head was buried in his smaller chest. His larger body shook, and he clutched the material of Kasuka's shirt. She could faintly his sobs, sharp breaths escaping his mouth. Kasuka was absently patting his back, staring at the ground as Shizuo cried.

Her youngest's eyes were blank as a white sheet of paper, the amber color having no sheen to it at all, his pale face blank as a doll's own.

"_Are you okay now, Onii-san?"_

Shizuo had gave a little hitching breath, sitting up slowly and looking at his brother.

His equally amber eyes were tinged with red, wet around the edges. His whole face crinkled in sadness.

_"Yea. Thanks, Kasuka."_

Kasuka had then taken the blanket draped over the back of the couch and wrapped it around his brother, and it nearly broke her heart, seeing how Kasuka was treating him so carefully.

Like glass.

**0o0**

"Shizuo, what have you done to your hair?"

Shizuo was sitting at the table in the kitchen, drinking a small bottle of milk.

"Bleached it."

"Well, I can see that! But why, honey? I liked your hair like it was before..."

Shizuo hadn't answered, and stared at the table.

Shortly after he left, heading to school.

**0o0**

"Acting classes?"

"Yea. Is that okay?"

Kasuka stared blankly at her, and she wondered how the idea ever had gotten into his head.

"Um..Yes, I'll look into it."

**0o0**

Now, all her babies had left.

She remembered feeling a little piece of her heart break when Shizuo moved out.

He hadn't even waited until high school was over.

The day he turned eighteen, it was snowing, and he had given her a kiss on the cheek before he walked out.

Kasuka had stared at the door along with her, and awkwardly gave her a hug, squeezing her in an attempt at comfort.

He left a year later.

Now, she still worked, and often walked around Ikebukuro, catching sight of her first son, chasing a dark haired man in a furry coat, or perhaps her second on a movie poster.

Each sent her money in the mail, but visits were rare.

On a warm evening, she decided to walk down to the convienience store, simply to get out of the house.

There, in the second aisle by the gummy bears, was Shizuo.

She lightly tapped his shoulder, watching as he turned around.

His stoic face went from irritated to the same as it had been as a child, when he caught site of his mother.

"Mom."

And without invitation, he reached out and hugged her, hard.

**0o0**

"Call or something more often, silly boy. And tell your brother to do the same."

**0o0**

**A/N: I'm really sorry if that was terrible. It was a lot better in my head, believe me. **

**The reason I wrote this is because of the lack of info on Shizuo's family. I always wondered what his mom thought, you know?**

**Sorry for lack of Kasuka, his character is hard not to go all OOC on.**

**Ugh. Forgive me, but tell me what you think.**

**Review?**


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